Sunday, August 8, 2010

A Steak Fry, and Fruit Flies...

Yes, it's true, a Steak Fry at the local fairgrounds, and a plethora of fruit flies in your kitchen, can mean only one thing. Those hot, hoomid, sweltering "daze" of Summer is coming to an end. Oh sure, Old Man Summer still has us in his sweaty grip, but make no mistake. Those fingers are getting more and more arthritic by the day.

It's now August up here in Northern Michigan, and the days still deepen into a long evening that only truly becomes night well past 10:00pm. But August also heralds the arrival of a certain local fair, and Onekama Days has the best Steak Fry ever! My beloved wife and I make this annual trek to the Fairgrounds with my brother, and enjoy some of the best cow ever served. Yes, we truly are Meatatarians!

The Onekama (go ahead, try and pronounce it, I dare ya) Lions are well known for this celebration of carnivorous catering. The proceeds go to the local Lion's Club (which does a wonderful job of supporting the community), and you see people from all over. And all kinds of people. Oh yes... our local village has many different local characters, and they *all* come to dine together this evening! From the table of Mohawk Hairdo's (Dad and Mom, all the kids) to the local gentry, and even the few Northern Michigan Dufus  that you just can't believe are really out of jail. Yet, here we all sit, behind a paper plate, merrily sawing into a quite tender steak, with plastic knives and forks.

The steak is roughly the size of the state of Rhode Island, and you can barely squeeze your baked potato (roughly the size of Delaware) next to it. Oh sure you also get a cuppa salad and a roll, even dessert if you wish. But here, for this evening, it's all about the steak! As we happily masticate our meat, we all agree that it must have come from a very happy cow. A cow that was proud to give it's life for such a noble endeavor as helping our Onekama (no, it's not One Comma) Lion's to raise muchly needed dollars for their various projects. In this time of a depressed economy, every organization is feeling the pinch. Most people are cutting back on their donations to charities, just like the governments have cut back on their services. But this magical evening, people come from far and wide, all to help a local charity, and (mostly) to eat a really good steak, at a really good price!

Ahhh.. with our paper plates polished off, and in the trash, we bid a fond adieu to the Onekama (ok, it's pronounced Oh-neck-a-ma) Lion's and drop my brother off at his apartment. Homeward we go, and home we arrive. I saunter (well, after all that steak, I really waddle, but who's to say?) over to the fridge to capture a cold beer, and that's when it hits me. Look at all those fracking Fruit Flies! Blech.

Aye yup, another sure sign of this August month... the bountiful blighters breed like bodacious bunnies in heat! Sigh. There's just *nothing* you can do! Maybe if we had central air conditioning we could keep them at bay, but like most true Northern Michiganders, we only permit one AC unit in our bedroom. Which means those tiny harbingers of doom and disease can simply flit thru the screens and invade our kitchens like a horde of ravenous porn stars in search of lube and a flat surface! Oh gawd, they are just disgusting. (No, I mean the fruit flies now) No matter how clean you keep the place, they just always overpopulate, every end of Summer. And they will claim your kitchen as their very own, until just before LadyBug Season.

Oh sure you can make sure there are NO dirty dishes, glasses, cups, or forks on the counter, and still they will find a way to permeate your favorite room. You even move the kitchen trash container out to the deck so the ugly little blighters will filthily procreate out there. Until you want to sit out and enjoy the sunset. Yuck.

But, ok. There you have it, don't you? You just figure out how to deal with them. It's just another annual event, much like steak night in Onekama (you do know how to pronounce it now, don't you?). And really, you realize that, it's alright. Sometimes Life gives you steak, and sometimes you get fruit flies. But really, it's just good to be alive, and be in a position that allows you to be thankful for both. Oh sure you really, really hate those little blighters, but in the end, are they really so terrible? They'll go away in a bit, and hey, you just had a great steak!

1 comment:

  1. My mouth is now watering again... thanks! He speaks the truth boys and girls... total yum.

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